تعبير بالانجليزي عن الصديقه
اليكم موضوع مميز عن الصداقه باللغه الانجليزية
friendship
This leads to a sense of familiarity, which is expected, but it can also give
a sense of intimacy, even friendship, which is wrong, because what’s going on here is
not friendship, although inside us many of the feelings that come from being a regular
reader of a weblog are the same ones we feel as we are developing a
friendship, in the world evolution designed us for. But this is not that world.
And with this comes a tough lesson, and unfortunately it seems, you only learn this
by living, television doesn’t teach it, schools don’t teach it, and if you’re above a
certain age, our parents didn’t teach it. You have to learn it by living, by
thinking of someone as a friend, only to find out they don’t think of you
as a friend. It can be devastating, I know, I’ve been there myself. But all
the wishing, all the manipulation, all the determination, just serves to push the would-be friend
further away. Because friendship is something you choose to do, you don’t do it out
of a sense of obligation. To force someone to be a friend is to not
have a friend.
It’s not just something that happens with blogs, celebrity of any kind yields a false
intimacy, they’ve made dozens of movies about it. The star is objectified. In the presence
of a fan, the star is not a human, it’s an object, it behaves the
way the fan wants it to behave. It signs the autograph, it smiles, it thanks.
Stephen King wrote a horror story about this called Misery in which the pro***onist is
bound, held hos***e and tortured by a fan. There’s an awful DeNiro movie, where he
plays a fan who’s determined to be friends with a star, played by Jerry Lewis.
It’s one of the few movies I’ve walked out on, it’s so hard to watch.
I learned a lot about friends when I got sick in 2002. I learned that
a friend is someone I trust to be with me when I am at my
weakest and most vulnerable. And they are people who, no matter how painful it is
to see, are willing to be with me when I am so helpless and weak.
If I would trust my life with you, and vice versa, we are friends. It’s
not about whether you are trustworthy, or whether you are friendly, it’s the actual act
of trust that is the basis of friendship. If I trust you to be truthful,
then you’re a friend. If I find I must be careful how I say things,
then it’s something other than friendship.
Friendship is not a state of mind, it’s an act. It’s something you do, it’s
not about whether you’re good or not, it’s not a reflection of you, it’s a
balanced relationship between people. That doesn’t mean it’s always balanced at every moment. Sometimes you
“need a friend” and other times it’s the other way. It’s a trust that’s returned.
When I was younger and thought I was in love, a friend said it’s not
love unless it’s returned. Friendship and love are not quite the same thing, although there’s
a lot of love around friendship. I learned that love isn’t even something about two
people, it’s a state of being for one person. You aren’t in love, you are
love. You are, whether you acknowledge it or not. The heart that’s pumping blood through
your body is an act of love, 24 hours a day, whether you’re Mother Teresa
or Adolf Hitler. (Sorry for the extreme example.)
There’s a world of difference between being a friend and being a fan. I’ve heard
people who I’ve never met say we’re friends. And then of course when I do
something they don’t like, I’ve betrayed the supposed friendship. They’re living in a dreamworld. The
more popular my weblog has become the more people have this dream. It’s very puzzling
to be the object in the middle of this swirl of emotions, I say object
because my job isn’t to be truthful, my job is to be who you think
I should be. Of course that’s not friendship, that’s torture.
In 1997 I wrote: “When a friend changes you can find the bond that’s connecting
you at a deeper level. The surface stuff isn’t a good thing to depend on.
Physical bodies change as they grow. So do emotional bodies and intellectual ones. Take a
deep breath. People move, life is more like a wild dance than a ceremony. You
just can’t tell what’s coming next.”
So if you find yourself trying to coerce someone into not changing, then dear reader,
that is not friendship, that is coercion
